I just had to share this real quick. Meg shared it on her blog and it's too adorably cute not to share immediately.
I don't even know that song but I love it now. I hope DJ gets to enjoy a daughter like I'm sure that daddy enjoys his daughter. I get to enjoy mother/son things and it's only fair that DJ should get to enjoy father/daughter things.
Friday, January 21, 2011
These are the days...
Sometimes I find myself in a moment where I just stop and look at my life like a snapshot. Like, here I am, with a baby, working from home, loving my life and I realize that these are the days I'm going to look back on and MISS. I'm always going to strive to live in the moment but it will be inevitable that I'll look back and a part of me will wish for these simple days.
And it also makes me treasure the moments that much more. Each moment, even if it's good or bad.
Even when Jayden is crying and I don't know why, I know that I will miss being able to easily console him by holding him in my arms. His "issues" are so simple right now, and I know one day his "issues" will not go away with a simple hug.
Even when I'm crazy busy at work with a deadline and I don't think there's enough time in the day to get it all done, I know that not everyone gets to work on their deadline and still get to see their family. I still get to kiss my husband when he gets home and nurse my son when he gets hungry and make sure our house is a home.
Even when I DO have to work, I still get to take time to spend moments with friends during the day. And that's exactly what made me stop today, just for the briefest of moments, and realize that life is so good right now. Even though I have a full day of work to get in today, I still got to see my son wake up, get him ready for the day, which is one of my favorite things to do because he is so gosh darn happy in the mornings, and go meet my friends and their kids for a morning walk.
I've never had a group of friends that get together on a consistent basis. I've always been blessed to have one very good friend that I would spend most of my social time with but now I have a group. And it's really not that it's better nor is it worse. It's just different. And I love that we are all friends because we are in a common place in our life and share the same struggles and blessings.
It's so fun to all get together and have all our kids together and I even like the general chaos that comes with having so many kids of different ages together.
Besides myself and Jayden (4.5 months),
there's Addie with Harlee (22 months), Trace and Ashton (7 weeks),
Becky (pregnant with #2 - 14 weeks) with Tyler (14 months),
Mandy is 31 weeks pregnant with #1,
Meredith with Colton (5.5 months) and
Natalie (pregnant with #4 - 25 weeks) with Jace (2), Tevyn (5) and Jayden (7).
We're going to be losing Natalie soon though. Her husband just got a new job so off they go to Indiana. That's the downside of having what we happen to have in common - all our husbands could get new jobs at any moment and then we move away.
But on the flip side, we're always gaining new faces too. We just gained one more new wife, Sarah with Jordan (2).
We all talk about getting a picture of all of us together with our kids because it will be so fun to look at it later and see just how crazy big our group is with the kids and the strollers (and the dogs too when we walk outside).
It's actually really humbling when I look at where I am right now in my life because God has blessed me so abundantly and he's proven to me again and again that He will provide for us just as we need it.
And now, I leave you with wise words from Van Morrison:
These are the days we must savor
And we must enjoy as we can
These are the days that will last forever
You've got to hold them in your heart.
And it also makes me treasure the moments that much more. Each moment, even if it's good or bad.
Even when Jayden is crying and I don't know why, I know that I will miss being able to easily console him by holding him in my arms. His "issues" are so simple right now, and I know one day his "issues" will not go away with a simple hug.
Even when I'm crazy busy at work with a deadline and I don't think there's enough time in the day to get it all done, I know that not everyone gets to work on their deadline and still get to see their family. I still get to kiss my husband when he gets home and nurse my son when he gets hungry and make sure our house is a home.
Even when I DO have to work, I still get to take time to spend moments with friends during the day. And that's exactly what made me stop today, just for the briefest of moments, and realize that life is so good right now. Even though I have a full day of work to get in today, I still got to see my son wake up, get him ready for the day, which is one of my favorite things to do because he is so gosh darn happy in the mornings, and go meet my friends and their kids for a morning walk.
I've never had a group of friends that get together on a consistent basis. I've always been blessed to have one very good friend that I would spend most of my social time with but now I have a group. And it's really not that it's better nor is it worse. It's just different. And I love that we are all friends because we are in a common place in our life and share the same struggles and blessings.
It's so fun to all get together and have all our kids together and I even like the general chaos that comes with having so many kids of different ages together.
Besides myself and Jayden (4.5 months),
there's Addie with Harlee (22 months), Trace and Ashton (7 weeks),
Becky (pregnant with #2 - 14 weeks) with Tyler (14 months),
Mandy is 31 weeks pregnant with #1,
Meredith with Colton (5.5 months) and
Natalie (pregnant with #4 - 25 weeks) with Jace (2), Tevyn (5) and Jayden (7).
We're going to be losing Natalie soon though. Her husband just got a new job so off they go to Indiana. That's the downside of having what we happen to have in common - all our husbands could get new jobs at any moment and then we move away.
But on the flip side, we're always gaining new faces too. We just gained one more new wife, Sarah with Jordan (2).
We all talk about getting a picture of all of us together with our kids because it will be so fun to look at it later and see just how crazy big our group is with the kids and the strollers (and the dogs too when we walk outside).
It's actually really humbling when I look at where I am right now in my life because God has blessed me so abundantly and he's proven to me again and again that He will provide for us just as we need it.
And now, I leave you with wise words from Van Morrison:
These are the days we must savor
And we must enjoy as we can
These are the days that will last forever
You've got to hold them in your heart.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Love Letters - One
Dear Jayden,
Who knew that you would become one of my favorite people to spend time with? I didn't. I didn't know babies could be so interesting. Sure, you can't talk yet. But you tell me things anyway. With your eyes, with your noises and sometimes with your cries. You fascinate me. And you fascinate your daddy too. We spend a lot of time these days just listening to you and watching you.
Last night I took you over to a friend's house and you were my date for the evening. Boys weren't allowed unless they were under the age of 3 so I'm sure glad you fit the criteria. You were a great date. Only once did you leave my side and that was just to be polite and let someone else enjoy your company for a little while. And then you let me know with a look that you were ready to come back and join me for some food. Not once did you take the attention away from anyone else. You were content observing all the chaos around you. And I loved holding you in my arms while chatting with the other women. We were a perfect pair.
I know that you may not always love to spend as much time with your momma but I can tell you that I'm enjoying every moment that I can right now. Just in case you change your mind later. I know that's just part of growing up and figuring out what you like and want. Hopefully you'll eventually learn that I can be pretty interesting too and am worthwhile company.
I just wanted to tell you that I love you (even though you hear it a hundred times or more a day and are shown that many more times with my kisses on your soft round cheeks) and to thank you for all the lovely moments we've been having together.
With love,
Your momma
Who knew that you would become one of my favorite people to spend time with? I didn't. I didn't know babies could be so interesting. Sure, you can't talk yet. But you tell me things anyway. With your eyes, with your noises and sometimes with your cries. You fascinate me. And you fascinate your daddy too. We spend a lot of time these days just listening to you and watching you.
Last night I took you over to a friend's house and you were my date for the evening. Boys weren't allowed unless they were under the age of 3 so I'm sure glad you fit the criteria. You were a great date. Only once did you leave my side and that was just to be polite and let someone else enjoy your company for a little while. And then you let me know with a look that you were ready to come back and join me for some food. Not once did you take the attention away from anyone else. You were content observing all the chaos around you. And I loved holding you in my arms while chatting with the other women. We were a perfect pair.
I know that you may not always love to spend as much time with your momma but I can tell you that I'm enjoying every moment that I can right now. Just in case you change your mind later. I know that's just part of growing up and figuring out what you like and want. Hopefully you'll eventually learn that I can be pretty interesting too and am worthwhile company.
I just wanted to tell you that I love you (even though you hear it a hundred times or more a day and are shown that many more times with my kisses on your soft round cheeks) and to thank you for all the lovely moments we've been having together.
With love,
Your momma
Monday, January 17, 2011
Breastfeeding Adventures
It feels a little awkward to have the word "breast" in a title on my blog that I know my dad and father in law may read but we're all adults right? And it IS nothing new after all. Breastfeeding is just a fact of life for millions of people all over the world and now for me too. And don't worry, I won't include any pictures on this post.
I've been wanting to write a post about this for awhile because breastfeeding was something that I was very much looking forward to before Jayden was born. I can't tell you why exactly because obviously it wasn't something I had ever done before but I think it was because I knew it could potentially play a significant role in the first year of Jayden's life and in our relationship as mother and son.
However, as far as setting myself up for success, I really didn't do a very good job.
First of all my knowledge of breastfeeding was slim to none before Jayden's birth. I attended one class at the La Leche League (I had intended to attend more but they were only held once a month and between moving from Tennessee and living in Rapid City for a month, I was only in town for the one meeting before Jayden was born.) and started reading a book written by La Leche League International (a very informative book that I would recommend to new breastfeeding mothers, FYI). Other than that I figured I would just, well, figure it out!
Secondly, a lot of the breastfeeding resources will tell you that you need a solid support system in order to be successful in breastfeeding for an entire year. I had some friends who breastfed their kids but they were not very successful past the first few months. The topic of breastfeeding never really came up with other friends that had kids. In fact, it's interesting that the whole topic really isn't discussed that much. Especially now that I know more about it and have learned just how prevalent it is in other cultures. And besides friends, I also never discussed the topic with my own mother or mother-in law. Again, not really something that came up over coffee. So I was 0-2 on the preparation front.
But in spite of the lack of preparation, breastfeeding has been successful. Jayden hasn't had a drop of formula and only one time has he had a bottle. And if you haven't noticed from the pictures, he's growing fine, more than fine really. He's off the charts.
(Regarding that one bottle, during the first week, when Jayden was still trying to figure out how to latch on and I had a TON of milk meaning that it made it even more difficult for him to latch on, he would understandably get so upset. Oftentimes this would happen in the middle of the night so one night, much to my dismay, we decided to feed some pumped milk to Jayden from a bottle. A major no-no because it's especially important those first few weeks that the baby only feed from the breast so there's no nipple confusion. I was so upset that we had given him a bottle that I didn't even consider giving him a bottle again until he was 8 weeks old.)
Anyway it's made me wonder why I've been successful with breastfeeding. Why, when I often give up with other less demanding situations, have I been able to stick it through with this particular thing? And I think it comes down to the fact that I wanted it to work so badly. If any of you know me well, you know that I can be stubborn. OK, I can be really stubborn. A lot of times that quality works against me, but in this case I think that's really all I had going for me. Had I not wanted it to work so badly, I don't think Jayden would have been breastfed past the first 2 weeks. It was incredibly demanding, painful and frustrating. But I kept going because in my mind, if I would have quit, I would have felt like a HUGE failure. And I just couldn't live with that, always wondering if things would have been different if I just kept going. I felt like I had to deal with the pain and just suck it up but let me tell you, it was not easy. And now I'm so so glad that I did stick with it because Jayden and I have pretty much found our groove.
(Please note that I don't blame anyone or look down on anyone or think anyone is a failure if they didn't breastfeed or didn't breastfeed very long. These are all my own personal sentiments about myself and myself only. The end.)
Probably about 3 months in, I could say that breastfeeding was no problem. I had pretty much encountered all types of different scenarios at that point, well... except for one place. I absolutely cannot feel comfortable breastfeeding during a church service. Other women can do it. Not me. I leave church and feed Jayden in the reception hall where there's a couch. That would just be too weird to feed Jayden during Mass. But movie theaters, restaurants, friends' houses, family members' homes, malls, anywhere else, I've got it taken care of. In a few years this probably won't seem like such a huge accomplishment but, as my mother has often reminded me since I had Jayden, it is very unusual for me to feel so comfortable just "whipping out a boob" sotospeak, in front of anyone and everyone. (Thank you mom for reminding me that I am no longer as bashful as I once was. Childbirth has a way of doing that to a person.) And anyway, I'm all covered up for heaven's sake.
I definitely hope to share more of my experiences with others like myself, pre-Jayden, and I also hope that, because I do feed Jayden in public, it will become less of an anomaly and there will be a time when people won't even think twice about it. Honestly, the world of blogging has opened my eyes to things that I'm so glad I found out about before I had Jayden. Because others were willing to be frank about their views on breastfeeding (and other "crunchy" topics [FYI, crunchy = earthy, hippy, etc]), I was able to learn from them and in turn, make a great decision for myself and my baby.
I could probably go on and on but I will end here for now and just say that, in case you are wondering, I won't be one of those people that breastfeeds their kid till he's 4 or 5 years old. That will not be me. I may be a little crunchier then some, but I am not THAT crunchy.
I've been wanting to write a post about this for awhile because breastfeeding was something that I was very much looking forward to before Jayden was born. I can't tell you why exactly because obviously it wasn't something I had ever done before but I think it was because I knew it could potentially play a significant role in the first year of Jayden's life and in our relationship as mother and son.
However, as far as setting myself up for success, I really didn't do a very good job.
First of all my knowledge of breastfeeding was slim to none before Jayden's birth. I attended one class at the La Leche League (I had intended to attend more but they were only held once a month and between moving from Tennessee and living in Rapid City for a month, I was only in town for the one meeting before Jayden was born.) and started reading a book written by La Leche League International (a very informative book that I would recommend to new breastfeeding mothers, FYI). Other than that I figured I would just, well, figure it out!
Secondly, a lot of the breastfeeding resources will tell you that you need a solid support system in order to be successful in breastfeeding for an entire year. I had some friends who breastfed their kids but they were not very successful past the first few months. The topic of breastfeeding never really came up with other friends that had kids. In fact, it's interesting that the whole topic really isn't discussed that much. Especially now that I know more about it and have learned just how prevalent it is in other cultures. And besides friends, I also never discussed the topic with my own mother or mother-in law. Again, not really something that came up over coffee. So I was 0-2 on the preparation front.
But in spite of the lack of preparation, breastfeeding has been successful. Jayden hasn't had a drop of formula and only one time has he had a bottle. And if you haven't noticed from the pictures, he's growing fine, more than fine really. He's off the charts.
(Regarding that one bottle, during the first week, when Jayden was still trying to figure out how to latch on and I had a TON of milk meaning that it made it even more difficult for him to latch on, he would understandably get so upset. Oftentimes this would happen in the middle of the night so one night, much to my dismay, we decided to feed some pumped milk to Jayden from a bottle. A major no-no because it's especially important those first few weeks that the baby only feed from the breast so there's no nipple confusion. I was so upset that we had given him a bottle that I didn't even consider giving him a bottle again until he was 8 weeks old.)
Anyway it's made me wonder why I've been successful with breastfeeding. Why, when I often give up with other less demanding situations, have I been able to stick it through with this particular thing? And I think it comes down to the fact that I wanted it to work so badly. If any of you know me well, you know that I can be stubborn. OK, I can be really stubborn. A lot of times that quality works against me, but in this case I think that's really all I had going for me. Had I not wanted it to work so badly, I don't think Jayden would have been breastfed past the first 2 weeks. It was incredibly demanding, painful and frustrating. But I kept going because in my mind, if I would have quit, I would have felt like a HUGE failure. And I just couldn't live with that, always wondering if things would have been different if I just kept going. I felt like I had to deal with the pain and just suck it up but let me tell you, it was not easy. And now I'm so so glad that I did stick with it because Jayden and I have pretty much found our groove.
(Please note that I don't blame anyone or look down on anyone or think anyone is a failure if they didn't breastfeed or didn't breastfeed very long. These are all my own personal sentiments about myself and myself only. The end.)
Probably about 3 months in, I could say that breastfeeding was no problem. I had pretty much encountered all types of different scenarios at that point, well... except for one place. I absolutely cannot feel comfortable breastfeeding during a church service. Other women can do it. Not me. I leave church and feed Jayden in the reception hall where there's a couch. That would just be too weird to feed Jayden during Mass. But movie theaters, restaurants, friends' houses, family members' homes, malls, anywhere else, I've got it taken care of. In a few years this probably won't seem like such a huge accomplishment but, as my mother has often reminded me since I had Jayden, it is very unusual for me to feel so comfortable just "whipping out a boob" sotospeak, in front of anyone and everyone. (Thank you mom for reminding me that I am no longer as bashful as I once was. Childbirth has a way of doing that to a person.) And anyway, I'm all covered up for heaven's sake.
I definitely hope to share more of my experiences with others like myself, pre-Jayden, and I also hope that, because I do feed Jayden in public, it will become less of an anomaly and there will be a time when people won't even think twice about it. Honestly, the world of blogging has opened my eyes to things that I'm so glad I found out about before I had Jayden. Because others were willing to be frank about their views on breastfeeding (and other "crunchy" topics [FYI, crunchy = earthy, hippy, etc]), I was able to learn from them and in turn, make a great decision for myself and my baby.
I could probably go on and on but I will end here for now and just say that, in case you are wondering, I won't be one of those people that breastfeeds their kid till he's 4 or 5 years old. That will not be me. I may be a little crunchier then some, but I am not THAT crunchy.
Friday, January 14, 2011
I'm an Exercising Fool
Today has been a great day already! I finally made it out this morning to go walk with the other wives/moms that I know here in Laramie before my nanny arrived and I had to get to work. I have seriously been trying to go walking since we moved here and I'm just now getting my act together. These women walk almost every day - it's actually pretty impressive because almost all of them have young kids (all WILL have kids in another month or two - one of them is due in March with her first baby) so it takes a little more effort to get out there. But I guess it's better late than never for me!
It felt so good to get some exercise in finally! I also got outside and walked over to a friend's house yesterday afternoon since we were having somewhat of a heat wave - I think it got up to 30 degrees. My exercise goal is coming to fruition and I couldn't be more thrilled. I can't wait to have my non-jiggly tummy back. I have a new Xbox game coming in the mail today as well. It's an exercise game that works with the Kinect so between the walking and the game, I should have my 6 pack again in no time at all (ha, ha, as if I could ever be devoted to working out enough to have a 6 pack!)
Since I really don't have an entire post to devote to these pictures, I'll just post them randomly here.
DJ's boss took his staff out to dinner the other night so Momma and Jayden (and Daddy of course) were headed out on the town. Jayden was dressed to the nines in his blue jeans.
Jayden likes to bury his head into my shoulder when he sleeps. Sometimes I'm not even sure he has room to breathe but right there on Momma's shoulder is where he likes it. And of course that's right where I like him too.
I caught Jayden sucking his thumb while he was sleeping the other day. Sadly, it won't be so cute in a few months when we'll need to break him of that habit but for now I console myself by the fact that he doesn't seem too attached to it.
We love to lay on the floor and talk to Jayden and he seems to love it too!
It felt so good to get some exercise in finally! I also got outside and walked over to a friend's house yesterday afternoon since we were having somewhat of a heat wave - I think it got up to 30 degrees. My exercise goal is coming to fruition and I couldn't be more thrilled. I can't wait to have my non-jiggly tummy back. I have a new Xbox game coming in the mail today as well. It's an exercise game that works with the Kinect so between the walking and the game, I should have my 6 pack again in no time at all (ha, ha, as if I could ever be devoted to working out enough to have a 6 pack!)
Since I really don't have an entire post to devote to these pictures, I'll just post them randomly here.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Roll over, Roll over - The Name of the Game
I get such a kick out of Jayden as he tries to roll over.
I love watching his little tiny legs shoot up in the air and then faaaalll to the side. He can do this over and over but those darn legs just keep getting in the way in order for him to keep going and make that full roll!
Jayden Milestones: Jayden is finally figuring out that he can reach for things and grab hold. I realized that his mind works just like his daddy's. He looks at something and you can just see his mind working. I think he has to fully think something through before he takes that first step, so to speak. I've been watching him as he contemplates reaching out for grab hold but he's just now decided to give it a try. Last night he reached for Ernie (his stuffed elephant with all sorts of "bells and whistles" attached) and took hold of the rings and then kept holding as I lifted him up! I was very proud.
I love watching his little tiny legs shoot up in the air and then faaaalll to the side. He can do this over and over but those darn legs just keep getting in the way in order for him to keep going and make that full roll!
Jayden Milestones: Jayden is finally figuring out that he can reach for things and grab hold. I realized that his mind works just like his daddy's. He looks at something and you can just see his mind working. I think he has to fully think something through before he takes that first step, so to speak. I've been watching him as he contemplates reaching out for grab hold but he's just now decided to give it a try. Last night he reached for Ernie (his stuffed elephant with all sorts of "bells and whistles" attached) and took hold of the rings and then kept holding as I lifted him up! I was very proud.
Monday, January 10, 2011
New Year's Resolutions
I've never been one to make an official New Year's resolution but I do think the beginning of the year is a good time to make changes. It always gets me thinking about what I want to do better, newer, more of, different over the next year.
This year I've got healthy on the brain.
Healthy eating.
Healthy living.
Healthy lifestyle.
I know why, of course. It's all because of Jayden. I think when you have a brand new little life that you're completely in charge of, naturally, you don't want to scre..um, mess it up. (Jayden might read this some day. Gotta watch my language ya know.)
But even before Jayden came along, DJ and I have tried making changes to our lives a little at a time to make them healthier. Some specific things that we have changed... We make a conscious attempt at eating more veggies. We try to drink a lot of water every day. We stopped using popular brands of peanut butter. We check the ingredients of foods that we buy and if possible, we make things from scratch, like spaghetti sauce, pizza sauce, that sort of thing.
But I want to continue to take those healthy steps forward because I think we... I can do better!
Another thing that has been on my mind in terms of "bettering myself" is BEING INTENTIONAL. Being intentional in my marriage, in my relationship with God, in my role as a mother and as a woman. Instead of just taking what life gives me, I want to have a say in it.
I don't want to just be satisfied with a good marriage; I want it to be GREAT.
I don't want to just say that "I'm a Christian"; I want my life to reflect God's goodness through my ACTIONS.
I don't want to just "make it" as a mother; I want to be a ROLE MODEL.
I don't want to just live with my new postpartum body; I want to be FIT and make my husband PROUD.
I think reflecting on our lives at the beginning of the year is a good thing. It gives us an opportunity to switch directions if we aren't quite going the way we want to be headed.
Jayden Milestones: This really isn't a milestone per se, but Jayden went 5 hours today without eating! Which means, of course, that I worked for 5 uninterrupted hours! That hasn't happened since August 13. It was definitely enough to make us (as in the nanny and I) stop and take notice. Jayden slept for 3 of those hours so I guess he was just wiped and food took second to sleep today.
Nicolette, the nanny, took Jayden on a quick little walk today but he didn't last long before he was out.
This year I've got healthy on the brain.
Healthy eating.
Healthy living.
Healthy lifestyle.
I know why, of course. It's all because of Jayden. I think when you have a brand new little life that you're completely in charge of, naturally, you don't want to scre..um, mess it up. (Jayden might read this some day. Gotta watch my language ya know.)
But even before Jayden came along, DJ and I have tried making changes to our lives a little at a time to make them healthier. Some specific things that we have changed... We make a conscious attempt at eating more veggies. We try to drink a lot of water every day. We stopped using popular brands of peanut butter. We check the ingredients of foods that we buy and if possible, we make things from scratch, like spaghetti sauce, pizza sauce, that sort of thing.
But I want to continue to take those healthy steps forward because I think we... I can do better!
Another thing that has been on my mind in terms of "bettering myself" is BEING INTENTIONAL. Being intentional in my marriage, in my relationship with God, in my role as a mother and as a woman. Instead of just taking what life gives me, I want to have a say in it.
I don't want to just be satisfied with a good marriage; I want it to be GREAT.
I don't want to just say that "I'm a Christian"; I want my life to reflect God's goodness through my ACTIONS.
I don't want to just "make it" as a mother; I want to be a ROLE MODEL.
I don't want to just live with my new postpartum body; I want to be FIT and make my husband PROUD.
I think reflecting on our lives at the beginning of the year is a good thing. It gives us an opportunity to switch directions if we aren't quite going the way we want to be headed.
Jayden Milestones: This really isn't a milestone per se, but Jayden went 5 hours today without eating! Which means, of course, that I worked for 5 uninterrupted hours! That hasn't happened since August 13. It was definitely enough to make us (as in the nanny and I) stop and take notice. Jayden slept for 3 of those hours so I guess he was just wiped and food took second to sleep today.
Nicolette, the nanny, took Jayden on a quick little walk today but he didn't last long before he was out.
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